10 things I’ve learned from watching “Friends”

It’s a Monday and I was feeling a little mehhh, so I decided to whip up this quick list to pay homage to my favourite TV show to cheer myself up. Some of them are wise thoughts, while others, euuhhh… not so much!

1. Don’t ever use the excuse “we were on a break”.
You could be sleeping on the couch for years to come. Or be single for life. Both are undesirable options.

2. If you can’t sense danger around the corner, then you do not have “Unagi”.
You can, however, get salmon skin roll at your local sushi shop. Yum!

3. Never wear leather pants.
Just. Don’t. I mean, how comfortable could they actually be?

4. If you’re going glow-in-the-dark mini putting, avoid whitening your teeth.
Let’s not scare your date off… or the children…

5. Don’t lie about lying about lying… about lying…
Because lying just ain’t cool, kids. Just ask Chandler.

6. Condoms are only like 97% effective.
Yes, it says it on the box (just not in big bold letters).

7. Make sure you know the name of the person you’re marrying.
“I, Ross, take thee Rachel” *gasps* Seriously man, you had ONE job!

8. No, that’s not how they measure pants.
Unless, you’re IN PRISON! If it feels wrong, then you’re probably getting violated and need to leave immediately.

9. Make sure you know which wind-up toy you have in a race.
You don’t want to end up with Alan – that hairy bastard.

10. And lastly, if you’re ever stuck, just…

EmptyPenguin is a gluten and dairy-free nerd who loves music, gaming, books and travel. And if you didn’t already guess, her favourite animals are penguins.

Written by EmptyPenguin

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